One Mother Rambling Through Life

Rantings, Ravings, Strange thoughts, a little bit of this, a little bit of that, and a lot of ME!

I am starting tomorrow! I missed the delivery that would have helped me start today. So I am picking up my package of products at the Post Office today. So today is my final day of preparation prior to starting. Mental preparation because I have to be ready mentally to really change my habits in almost every way. Three meals and snacks daily to two meals and no snacks daily. Plus that is two micro meals. Maybe not micro meals but smaller meals.

Plus Physical preparations  for the increase in water that I will be taking in for the new diet. I'm going to be like one of those huge water balloons on youtube ready to pop at any minute. Don't get me wrong I drink water throughout the day usually just not to the volume that is required for this diet to be successful. Plus I usually drink coffee and soda and I will have to severely cut back on my soda intake for this to work as well.

I can do it! I can do it! I am willing to do what I need to do to make this work. I don't care if the product taste like medicine and are the consistency of drinking toothpaste I am going to make it though and give this my all. I am sick and tired of being fat.

Cheers! I will let you know how the first day goes!

So last night I weighed in and completed measurements for the beginning of my journey. A leap. I will officially start on August 2nd most likely because I am supposed to get the package in the mail on August 1st. I am feeling hopeful.

Yesterday I formally introduced myself to the support group on Facebook for the program with a picture, my measurements, and how much I am looking to lose. All in all for a healthy weight I am looking to lose 60 -85 lbs. I know from my previous weight loss that in between those numbers I am comfortable. It is a hefty number. Really go pick up something that weighs between that. Like...
60 lbs...

A small child
A small bag of cement
A Boxer (dog)
An armchair
A standard punching bag
3 car tires
6 Chihuahuas

What weights 80 lbs...

A Labrador Retriever
A dishwasher
A normal bag of concrete
4 standard dining room chairs
8 bags of sugar

A little something to think about when you think about the extra weight you might or might not be carrying.

So here is where I am starting at...


So I read a lot about the Gastric Bypass Alternative...No Surgery and watched the videos that were published... If anyone is interested I am hyperlinking the page HERE. There is some interesting information. So a couple of high points from the video posted by the inventory on that sight...

1) He encourages anyone that CAN lose the weight with only the use of diet and exercise to do that instead of buying the product. This resonated with me because so many products are only interested in selling and not necessarily if it would be a waste of money for the consumer. This product openly encourages you not to spend your money if you have an alternative.

2) You have to hate being FAT and not just see yourself as OVERWEIGHT or OBESE because in his opinion you have to have that anger and hatred toward your current situation to be serious enough to really follow the program. It is kind of a "I'm at a place where I will do anything!"

3) There are a lot of dangers inherent to the actual surgical solutions to weight loss and the inventor stated that it is ridiculous to think that cutting into oneself is a solution if there are other options. This was invented so that people could have the same affect without surgery. The inventor points out that the stomach is a muscle and that it will stretch out over time and that the side effects are not worth it. Vitamin absorption is completely different and not adequate. The inventor stated that the reason a lot of people really lose the weight with the surgery is not because of changes in habit but because eating is painful when miscalculated after surgery and leads to dumping syndrome. Sounds terrible.

4) Only 53% of people qualify because they really do only want people who they feel like will be able to benefit from the program and not waste people's money, people's time, or kill their success rate. The inventor said some people make it through still because they lie in the assessment but that it is not common.

5) This is a customized weight loss program without the office visits and cost associated with the said office visits. Each person completes the assessment to qualify for the program and through that assessment they build a program just for that person and the weight loss that they want to be healthy and happy. The program has a lot of long term success stories and has only improved. The program boasts better results for longer periods because it is personalized. Each program has a different expected duration. They do not expect that everyone will lose at the same rate or be on the program for the same time. So even if you have less to lose overall they state that they are not going to tweak your program to keep you on it longer.

6) The program encourages connections to the inventor and approved moderators for questions and the community of other people on the program for support and encouragement. The program once again points out that you cannot ask other users for advice on how to use the product because every one has a custom program and schedule.

7) You eat normal food on the program. I will say it again YOU EAT ON THE PROGRAM! You just eat less because the product makes you full and you cannot eat as much. There are also some habits that they want you to use when eating. It helps you process your food and know when you are really full versus SATISFIED. One thing I know about eating after years of dieting is that eating is not about fuel for most people and we eat to satisfy something else emotional or psychological but it changes how we approach food and sometimes how much we will eat.

8) Rewarded for reaching your healthy weight. Which is not the weight they give you based on your BMI but where you are comfortable. Which to them means within 15 - 20 lbs of your goal. When you reach a weight they you are comfortable at and you feel like you have achieved success. If you do a video for the program to show your success (with the company not on your own) you will get 100% of what you spent on the product back! Crazy but a pretty amazing claim.

The program is simple to do if you follow the rules. The people who really follow the program are able to lose weight relatively quickly. This is the only program I have seen that encourages you to weigh yourself in the morning and before bed boasting that you will see weight loss between to two. Interesting so we will have to see.

So prior to making this leap I purchased my new calendar which happens to be a fitness calendar for 2018...In my job I have to look ahead and schedule out so I already needed 2018. But I am excited to use it in connection with this new journey. The site said that my product would be shipping on July 31 and would arrive on August 1st. So I am really excited and ready. I need to take the measurements that I dread for my introductory post on the support site on facebook. Ugh. I hate weighing myself and taking measurements. But I am determined to make this change mentally and physically which is why I am also determined to blog this out.

Hello after my hiatus of life and many many things. I am back with a new reason for blogging. I want to be healthy mentally and physically and this is my platform to do that and hopefully encourage others along the way.

I need to lose weight because I cannot be in denial any longer. I cannot let my selfies that only show what I want be my reality because that is not the real reality. This...

Is just a façade that I am putting on to make myself feel better. Well right now I say no more.
I have gained weight, lost weight, gained it again, etc etc. I have come to terms with emotional eating and concerns but even knowing why I eat I still give in to temptation. I am tired of being larger and want to lose the weight and try again to keep it off. But first to lose the weight. I have done it wrong and right. This time I want to do it both wrong and right. Wrong because I am not a fan of any gastric bypass related weight loss because of the possible longer term affects and killing my metabolism but this product has stated that it will not do that. Right because I will also change my eating habits during this. So first to start with my journey to where I am now...

I started my last weight loss journey in June of 2014 weighing 225 lbs. By April of 2015 I was at 150 lbs. I used the Atkins carb cutting program and phases to achieve this weight loss and Chris Powell's bootcamp DVD along with walking regularly. To be completely blunt during this time I had a lot of time on my hands in the evening because my husband was working as a bouncer and I was home alone most nights of the week. So it made it easier to lose the weight. Plus I really enjoyed my job so when I was at work I was able to focus with little temptation. I would have my Atkins snacks and shakes and walk throughout the day to ensure I was not sitting all day long. I maintained a healthy weight gaining back about 15 lbs by the time we moved in April 2016.

In May of 2016 I started working as a CPS services worker which is a highly stressful job, in a highly stressful office situation, and living in a stressful home environment while in transition. Between May of 2016 and December of 2016 I shot from 165 to 230 lbs. I would eat and snack throughout the day. Even when I moved to a better living environment my husband was not regularly home and I would choose time with him over working out.

In March of 2017 I changed to a much better job and my schedule was much better. I had more flexibility but I had already gained the weight. I need something to jump start my weight loss. Just like most people I need to see results a little bit to get really excited and going on a diet. So I made the leap and spent the $$$ to get the jump start. Now whether or not this will work is another question. Here I am with 80 lbs to lose. I ordered the product today and should get it by August 1st.

Starting today.
Cheers and fingers crossed.

Today does not feel like it is still winter. Today's weather was a cool day in the 60s with just enough breeze that it was refreshing. It reminded me of days in the park as a child, hanging out with high school friends, ghost hunting in college (long story but the name is deceptive), and long drives to no where with my then boyfriend and now hubby.

When I was younger my father loved to cook out. Every time chance he got he would marinate chicken and throw it on the grill. I would sit and watch and chit chat. I am sure that he loved and hated it. Some days my nose would run from the cold but I cherished that time with my father and still love the memories. Really every chance I got to be around my father one on one I took. On Sundays he would nap with his headphones on next to his "state of the art" stereo. When I say state of the art I am talking about the dual cassette and record player with all the knobs and switches on a huge box system that measured 2 feet wide square by 4 feet tall with 2 matching speakers not much smaller than the actual unit. He would put on one of his many records or tapes, plug in the ole ear muff style headphones, and lay down and "cruise". His story was that he was just relaxing and listening to music. The well known truth was that he was napping. The sweet part was that there was a dual headphone dock and he would often let me join him. No I did not nap. I was a kid so napping was the enemy. But I did enjoy listening to his music and cuddling up next to him. Wish I had a picture of this one because I really enjoyed that time. I hope that my kiddos have memories like this with me when they grown up.

In high school my friends and I loved to hang out at a local park next to the college. We would talk about boys, life, school, and whatever was on our silly minds. The college intramural teams played there and most of the local boys who liked basketball had pick up games at the courts. We would walk the sidewalk that went around the park and look at the sites. I would be lying if I said we didn't hope that one of our walks would involve meeting guys. Probably the best story I have from those days was a walk I will never forget. One of my best friends and her sister had come with me to walk that day and there was a game of flag football going on in the main area off of the sidewalk. We had gone around a few times and had enjoyed watching the veracity in which the guys were playing. Suddenly, as if choreographed in a movie, all of the players stopped what they were doing and sang "Honey,
Oh Sugar Sugar,
You are my Candy girl,
And you got me wanting you..."
We stood there giggling like any teenage girls would do in that situation. The problem arose at the fact that all three of us were shy girls and none of our bold counterparts were there with us. So what did we do. Giggle and dash! They stood there kind dumbstruck for a moment and went back to their game thinking who knows what about us. If you asked any of us about that event we all probably remember it sweetly because it was just one of those wonderful moments that give a teenage girl hope for future romance and love.

In college I spent a lot of time walking everywhere. Walking to class, to the dorm, to eat, to the movies, to get groceries, to events, to friends dorms, etc and so on. I ended up with a great group of friends that I am so grateful for the memories that they gave me. One night we decided that we should check out the "haunted" locations on campus. So what are the tools to arm yourself with when going on a ghost hunt? Well. Water guns, bubbles, chocolate, and tootsie pops of course. I cannot remember what time we went out but it was a little after dark when we set out. We had mapped out the best path to hit the hot spots and had actually researched the stories about the hauntings. For some of us this was a little more than we studied for our other courses at the time. We had a blast. Mainly photo ops of stairways to no where and Charlie's Angel style posing with our water guns. Loads of laughs and a memory that I think we all will cherish. It was silly times like that that I sometimes fall back on as a pick me up.

When I met my now Hubby we found out that we both enjoyed a few similar things and among them were midnight walmart trips for no reason, baseball, and drives to no where on nice nights. My husband is a fan of cars. More specifically a fan of Toyota's. When I met him he had an 1988 White Toyota Celica convertible. It had a cd player and its heater/AC worked when it felt like it. It purred like a kitten. On cool nights we would put the top down, put on some Daily Planet, and drive. Sometimes we would end up somewhere and other times no where. We would talk about dreams and life. We discussed what we wanted and what he hoped for. It was an innocent time in the relationship that I try to take time to remember because it is something that we can't relive but it shaped the love that became our relationship and led us to where we are now. Just one of many sweet memories I have.

Now on days like today I make new memories but now it is with three children and my grown up life. Life is made up of moments. Some good, some bad, but all worth remembering. These moments shape who we are and what we become. They shape how we make our decisions and who we trust. I am grateful for my moments and the people that were a part of the moments of my life.

So as a Mom (or Dad depending on your role in the family) we get to graduate from the Where's Waldo world of seeking and finding interesting things in pictures to our own grown up live version of seek and find. Some of those games are:
  • Find the shoe- you can always find at least one shoe, however the second shoe is generally hiding in some obscure to very obvious place to be found at a later date when finding it does not matter in the slightest and you will forget either finding it or if you are fortunate enough to remember you have since forgotten where the other is.

  • Finding the blankie, the nook, the pacie, the whatever security item is needed for rest in general- in this game you frantically search the house, car, or where ever you are for said item. All the while you have a whining little creature following you crying about wanting to find the said item. This generally ends with peace of mind when the item is found and the creature has tuckered itself out from all the whining in the hunt. When the item is not recovered better prepare your straight jacket because it will be a battle of epic proportions to get the creature to sleep and then it will be your turn to pass out from the hunt. Sometimes this game ends in screaming and saying "if you had kept up with it it would not be lost so deal with it."
  • Find the smell- This game involves searching the house, car, or fridge for what is causing the terrible smell to fill said space. This ends in disgusting cleaning work or simply trashing the toxic waste

  • Find the keys- For some reason the small creatures that live with us like the clanking sounds that keys make and feel that your keys are necessary for the sound as well as playing house. So you search high and low and finally find the keys in the logical place... the toy box

So the next time you are playing an adult seek and find remember to stop and smile since these games do come with cuddles, giggles, and the reward of watching those little creatures become wonderful people!

A little break from my recent yarn for a little fun about the situation I currently find myself in...

Now that I am unemployed I can...

  • Research all of those big career tracks that I would love to have but don't qualify for and don't have the money to get the degree to qualify for them.

  • Write the next American Novel in all that spare time that two children under 4 give me.

  • Clean the house as the afore mentioned children under 4 tear through it.

  • Learn to bake like a pro when I am not making fish sticks, grilled cheese, PB&J, and the many other kiddo faves.

  • Catch up on the scrapbooking and try to ensure that the living room is not covered in glitter when the kiddos want to "help."

  • Sleep in a little later or at least until my three year old comes and wakes me up.

  • Play on Facebook for brief periods all day long.

  • Find a play group and see what that is like and if it really is a cut throat world of Mom's and my kid is better than yours.

  • Try out this Mother's day out concept if I can manage the money out of the budget to do so.

  • Read those magazines that come in the mail that I never had a chance to read before.

  • Cook meals instead of "warming things up" (Courtesy of Johnson home boys)

  • Check on my unemployment, CHIPS, WIC, and TANF statuses online since we now qualify due to my lack of income.

  • Realize that I am becoming exactly what I did not want to be with the above item.

  • Try to decide what to do next.

  • Watch stupid movies while I fold laundry.

  • And the best in this list is that I get to spend the days with my kids while they are still small.

Here is the deal. I lost my job on Monday. This was a shock to me and my family and seemed to come out of nowhere. It was not a good situation as there was no warning or predicating issue at work anywhere near this time. So now we are crunching numbers and deciding what to do from here. Keeping positive through this.

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